Ya know those guys that ask you to hypothetically marry them on the first date? Yea, I didn’t either. Oh and even more so on the second? Definitely no. I’ve been so used to dating duds that have one foot strategically placed out the door, that this dude blindsided me. Perhaps I hadn’t gone for enough religious fellows. They want to get married immediately apparently. Why bother learning anything about each other, lets just get hitched!
It is endearing and flattering after dating so many Peter’s, but this is just too much. On our first date there was real chemistry and connectedness. He was tall-ish, attractive, cuddly, driven, family orientated, and had good style + dance moves. So yea, he seemed intriguing. He also said that he was engaged a couple of years ago, and if the girl came crawling back he would give it another shot. But then meets me and apparently wants to jump right on the marriage train. Mildly weird to admit to a girl you suddenly think is the love of your life right? Red flag.
On the chemistry front, it was hot. No I didn’t sleep with him, as that’s not my style. But after an intense makeout sesh, I could see him being really good in bed. As I’ve learned though, being good in bed means nothing about long term potential. Anyone who thinks it does, is kidding themselves. All of the other things have to line up too. Friend with benefits? Maybe. Although I don’t think this guy would go for such a casual situation.
He made a line that implied that he was homophobic, and said he attends church every sunday religiously. He said he was built on strong military values and super loyal. Well, great for you (maybe), but I wasn’t built on those things. We would have very different backgrounds. Maybe church and military are things I could learn to live with (highly doubtful), but homophobic is a total dealbreaker. If you’re homophobic, fuck off. I made sure to casually string in something along the lines of thinking gay porn was hot on our second date to see how he would react. He tried to hold it together, but I could tell I was making him uncomfortable. I should pull that line with other guys to see how secure they are with their masculinity, haha. My ex, even with all of his flaws, would’ve been totally nonchalant with his response. I respect that type of dude, even if it’s only in that tiny way.
Now wifey guy has already started calling me pet names, and sees this amazing future. But what’s the deal? It’s so weird. We’ve been on a total of two dates. My mom thinks that’s a bit intense to tell any girl on the first or second date, as we don’t even know each other. Not really at least. I want to like him as much as he thinks he likes me, but the whole thing is too needy. There is no intrigue. No game. No nothing. Just hey, you’re beautiful and driven, lets get married. What happened to courting me, then making it official and exclusive, and then moving in together, and then and only then just maybe tying the knot? Are we expected to get married in a catholic church or a mountaintop with a buddhist monk helping recite the vows? Yea, bet you hadn’t thought that far, eh?
We’re not alike. It’s nice meeting someone so into me, so quickly, but it’s a bit much.